Monday, August 19, 2013

How does attraction actually work?

Do you ever feel like you've been hoodwinked? Tricked into something you thought was going to be something else? That's how I'm starting to feel with certain television shows. Supernatural, obviously, judging by my previous post, but also a little teen Australian drama called Dance Academy. I used to dance the ballet, once upon a time in a galaxy far, far away. So it holds a special place in my heart, one full of positive memories, at least up until my toes started bleeding. But with Dance Academy, it tricked me.

This is supposed to be a safe show for kids and teens. Rated probably a PG on the grading scale. And it is safe, albeit corny and predictable and emotionally unstable, but only up to a point. Has anyone ever watched Buffy: The Vampire Slayer? And felt totally side-swiped when Willow turned lesbian? Because that was me. One of my favorite characters turned homosexual on me and I never, ever wanted that to happen again. Well, guess what, it did!

Except this time it happened to the nicest, stablest boy in Dance Academy. I was so ecstatic at the beginning of the show because they're weren't going the typecasting route of a gay ballet dancer! No, instead, they make you care about Sammy, want his relationship with Abigail to work, and then be totally flummoxed when he starts having "muffins" (his code word for feelings) for his roommate, Christian (an Asian/Aussie guy). Sammy and Christian are besties. Of course they're attracted to one another as individuals or they would never spend time together like they do. It's a natural part of relationships. You're going to find chemistry with people of the same sex all the time! I know I do!

Where the world goes wrong is assuming that normal attraction means sexual attraction. When Sammy and Christian start spending a lot of time together in sort of a "band of brothers" motif, one of the girls in this group starts Sammy thinking on why he spends so much time with Christian. What if he really likes him? What if he's not straight as he'd always believed? Because it's unnatural to like another guy that much and spend so much time together. Kat did it to him. She planted the seed and Sammy started wallowing in self-doubt because of her. And through his identity crisis, Sammy arrives at the monumental and erroneous conclusion that he is sexually attracted to Christian.

This is how the world tricks us. We are being brainwashed to think that because we love being with someone of the same sex, spending time with them, and like them more than our other friends, that we're sexually attracted to them. Attracted, yes, but there is nothing sexual about it. But the world has planted the notion that if you like spending that much time with someone of the same sex that it must be sexual attraction because is no other explanation.

Jonathan and Saul (The Bible miniseries)
All right, look. One of my favorite stories in the Bible is about David and Jonathan. These men were not blood brothers, but they might as well have been. They made a covenant together and Jonathan became "one in spirit" with David, treating him as he treated himself. They were besties, but the modern view of David and Jonathan is that they had a homoerotic relationship. What part of "one in spirit" implies they were one in flesh? Nothing. These two men connected in a spiritual way, an attraction that meant they put each others safety and well-being ahead of their own. They were attracted to each other, but it was not a sexual attraction.

David (The Bible miniseries)
The world has it wrong. And the farther we go from God, the worse it gets. Because the world is confused about how sexuality and attraction works, kids like Sammy in Dance Academy get confused, and they influence the kids watching the show. It's a vicious cycle of deceit that the Enemy has thrust upon the world and I have a feeling this is how he's planning to take us down. If humans can't figure out how sexuality and attraction works, well, we're just going to sink deeper and deeper into this quagmire of sin.


  1. The truly sad thing is that this kind of an approach and belief system means that NOTHING is innocent or pure anymore. It prevents men from having close friendships, out of fear that someone will see them as gay. It alienates and divides us, it confuses us sexually, and it forgets that attraction doesn't always mean "sex." It can simply be kindred spirits.

    1. We have parents immediately thinking their little boy is gay if he likes to play with Barbie when he's three. I consider that to mean his testosterone is developing faster than anticipated, if you know what I mean.

      The relationship between Christian and Sammy was awesome. They were best mates in a totally normal setting until that girl decided to throw a wrench in the works. Is that what we naturally assume when we see two men who are really close? I'm not sure if there is even a way we can backtrack from this craziness, it's so widespread. We may not be able to fix it.

  2. Well said. I don't hear a lot of people talking about this subject. You really summed it up perfectly. It's so sad that it's starting to run rampant, especially in the entertainment industry, confusing and hurting people.
    I really liked what you said about Jonathan and David. Why so many people can't understand a deep friendship doesn't mean romance is beyond me.

    1. Hey, nice to meet you!

      Well, I think a lot of people prefer to think there are no boundaries so anything goes. The idea that two guys can be kindred spirits with nothing more intended just doesn't compute for their brains. There has to be something more, absolutely must because nothing else makes sense to them.

      I fear our days of close friendships between men might be gone because of how they could be interpreted. The world is a little more kindly towards women, but men aren't supposed to need anyone else, certainly not to the point of having a male bosom buddy without it being sexual.

  3. Great post! It really is terrible how prevalent homosexuality is in TV/movies - like you said, they're trying their best to brainwash us into thinking it's normal and acceptable! The worst thing I think is all the "tolerant" Christians who aren't standing up for the truth and instead "accept" homosexuality. Thanks for speaking out!

    1. I know a lot of Christians think we need to be tolerant, but I'm not so sure anymore. I think reading about the founding fathers of our faith, the apologists of the early Church, has been good for me. Most of them would have never kept silent over an issue they knew was important. We shouldn't be any different.

  4. Boy, Carissa, you're having bad luck with TV shows these days. I know how hard it can be when something you enjoy a great deal turns and burns you. Not fun. :/

    Awesome article! Very very well put. I had watched a few episodes of Dance Academy myself a few months ago. So frustrating to see even kids shows like this are dabbling in homosexual plot lines and propaganda. The hormonally-charged, hyper-sensitive mindset of the teenage years are confusing enough without all of that. Not to mention that its during those years we tend more towards developing extreme admiration and affection for others, even of the same sex. It's awfully easy to confuse these feelings of ours for something more physical, since our bodies are simultaneously experiencing for the first time, erm, admirations of a physical nature. But when the culture is constantly harping on how if you feel anything you might think could be attraction towards someone of the same sex, "well of course you're gay, and that's fantastic!" it pushes teens into coming to conclusions they probably wouldn't have come to if puberty was allowed to run its course without any hasty interference.

    (Not just teens either, now even infants are being raised in a gender-neutral fashion. Even refusing to allow them to use or play with anything at all gender specific. That's got to be a rough childhood)

    Brings to mind this article on the evolution of man to man friendships over the years (from the awesome "art of manliness" site):

    It's tragic when people are being forced apart from really close relationships because of cultural stigmas. Funny, since homosexuals claim that their cause is against exactly that. :/

    1. Pretty much all the men I see in my life either A) don't have a close male friend or B) aren't openly affectionate with the ones they do have. They're afraid. Afraid of what others might think of them, afraid of having draw the wrong conclusions, and afraid that they even have to be afraid in the first place.

      I LOVE your last couple of sentences, Ruby. Yes, the homosexuals are trying so hard to get everything out in the open (as it were), but they're forcing stuff out in the open that was NEVER there to start with! They've raised unnecessary doubts because, I don't know, they're lonely in their homosexuality? They want more to join the ranks? Yes, exactly that! This is the type of infiltration that causes the most harm, and they're getting away with it.

      It's heart-breaking. I can tell you right now that if I ever have a boy, he's going to have toy trucks and soldiers and anything little boyish that he wants to play with. If I ever have a little girl it goes the same with her with dress-up and dolls and kitchen sets. And if I have a girl who likes to play cowboy, then so what? So did I, as I recall. My sister and I had many a glorious shoot-out with cap-guns in our backyard. To say nothing of my sister beating a male friend in a lightsaber duel! And I will never say anything to make them think that they can't play with the toys that appeal to them, even if it means my daughter wants a toolbox playset. Maybe she'll grow up to be a mechanic. Freaking out over the possibility that a child might be homosexual doesn't help them, neither does the assumption that because a girl likes boy toys that she is homosexual and you cater to that.

      There, end mini rant. I just think I've been focusing really strongly on this topic lately, probably because it keeps cropping up, and every time I see it in print the news just keeps getting worse.

      Anyhoo, thanks for that website! That's so totally awesome! I only skim-read the article but really like what I saw so I'll have to finish it this week. :)

  5. Ran across this older post of yours (and I'm sorry, I don't have time to leave an in-depth comment :/), but just wanted to say it was absolutely GREAT and I heartily agree and much appreciate it. Thanks so much!!

    1. Wow, I actually forgot I wrote this post, it's been so long. But thank you, very much. I remember the frustrations I felt, which is probably why I'm a little reluctant to try new shows now. I hate getting so attached to something and then having it turn against me. I felt the same level of frustration with Supernatural. Such a great show for 3 or 4 seasons and then it was all downhill from there. So sad.


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