Friday, December 30, 2011

Musings of an Introvert


As we welcome the new year, I've realized just how much has happened over the past year that I hadn't planned on. I was promoted at work to a completely different branch library and a totally different position. Lots of new and fun learning experiences there, plus lots of new responsibilities. I started classes at a new university, this one a Christian university out east (online) that I really, really love. I hadn't realized just how much I yearned to be in a Christian learning environment until I was actually in one.

Most of all, I realized that I'm actually an introvert. What's more, that introverted side of me is becoming stronger now that I realize it's actually there. There's a board game night at a local church on New Year's Eve. Caitlin's planning to go with a young coworker of hers, also named Kaitlyn. I'm invited too but I have absolutely no inclination to go. Which has me wondering if my being this introverted is actually a bad thing. I've always been shy at social events with people I don't know. It's hard on me emotionally and my conversation skills fly right out the window.

Yet, despite my thoughts that this is actually a bad thing, I'm not unhappy in my introvertedness.

God made us individuals with individual personality types. That means my personality is actually a blessing from Him. I'm not a shut-in. I go out with friends and fraternize with coworkers and patrons. I love being around people! But I'm also very much aware of my social limitations. By the time I've been around people three full days a week, I'm ready for a chance to recharge. In fact, I need a chance to recharge!

If I weren't going because of fear that would be one thing. But I'm honestly not worried about being around so many people, I'm just not interested. I'd much rather be at home, reading my textbooks (it's Victorian lit so you can appreciate my excitement) for my upcoming semester and maybe even working a little on my sister's birthday gift (since her birthday is in only a few short weeks).

Perhaps the best advice to introverts is to pace themselves. I don't have to do everything I'm invited to. I'll have 2 dance classes a month starting in January, plus 2 anime club meetings a month where I'm surrounded by 10+ teen girls (scream "I surrender!" with me). There's no need for an introvert to feel guilty that they need to turn down social events. My particular personality type is happiest with only a few very close friends and numerous special acquaintances.

If I find happiness in reading Persuasion while listening to Vivaldi, well, where's the harm in that?

Happy New Year, everyone!

4 comments:

  1. I'm much the same way. I used to worry that I wasn't outgoing and didn't want to attend big social functions, but it's just who I am. I'm happiest with one or two people around me that I feel comfortable with.

    Happy New Year! =)

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  2. I'm wondering if, when Caitlin starts socializing more, that she'll be more extroverted than she thinks. She actually wants to get out and meet people and do things. I'm happier when I don't do those things! It's a good thing God made all personality types or we'd be in major trouble!

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  3. It's possible. I think our type can change (to a certain degree) as we get older. Maybe when you were homeschooled and not working, you craved people more, so you were more extroverted -- and now that you're working with people, you crave alone time.

    Over the years, I have struggled a great deal with wanting to be included, and do "some" things, and wondering if it makes me happier or just more tired! I'm wondering if I need more alone time, or if I need more socializing.

    Oh, well. 2012, maybe I'll find out. =P

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  4. I am definitely not a very outgoing person. I have to "push" myself into social situations because I'd much rather be home reading or watching a movie - or writing. ;D However, of late, I've been doing a lot better, and in some cases, even enjoying myself.

    Happy 2012!

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